And the Two Shall Become One

Jacob has recently started doing something interesting.

If Lesley's in the living room with him playing and I'm in the kitchen cooking supper, Jacob will take her hands, stand up, and "walk" her into the kitchen to be next to me.

Or, in the morning if I'm playing with him in the bedroom and Lesley is in the bathroom brushing her teeth getting ready for work, he will crawl to the bathroom door, open it, and sit on the threshhold so that he can see both of us.

Or, at night when we have Jacob in bed with us, he will get upset if he doesn't have one hand holding Lesley's and one hand holding mine. Holding just Lesley's or just mine isn't good enough. He has to be holding both before he settles down.

Jacob expresses in these moments a profound truth. For him, Lesley and I are not two separate people, but one. He becomes distressed when we give the appearance of separation or disunity.

I believe babies can see things adults forget to see. It's nice to have him around to remind me of the things that I should see.

Happy Birthday!!!

Now, here's a kid who knows how to eat a cake!

Before:















During:

After:

Seriously, both hands...one bite...it was over. And Jacob has discovered his favorite food. He loves it. He can't get enough of it. And the best part is, two hours after his sugar overload, he's out cold for a nice long nap. Now I know what to do when I want to take a nap but he won't settle down.

I'm joking, of course.

He got some great toys. A toy telephone, which he apparently already knows how to use. The first thing he did when we got it out of the box was hold it up to his ear. He got a ride on/walk behind toy, which he loves. A mizzou tiger with a tee shirt so that he'll be ready for New Year's Day and the Cotton Bowl. A fire truck, which he dances to. A ball popper, which we found is as much fun for his 12 year old cousin as it is for him. Spider Spud, not from dad, but dad is good with it. He got an aquadoodle, not aquadots. And from Grandma and Grandpa, beer money for college.

All in all, I'd say he had a pretty good birthday. Mom agrees.

Is It Early or Late?

Here I am and the clock on the computer says that's it 3:47 am. Jacob woke up about a quarter after 2. Lesley was kind enough to get him out of his room, lay him in bed with us and feed him a bottle. After chugging his bottle, he decided to lay in bed with us and discuss his day's itinerary. He's got a lot going on today; the kid would not be quiet.

He should have a lot going on today. It's the day before his first birthday.

He said he was really excited about going to school today because they're going to have his birthday party. He said he hopes he gets lots of presents from his classmates. I told him that I didn't think his classmates were going to bring him any presents. I said it would more likely be just a cupcake party with some good music. He thought for a minute, and then said that would be all right. He said he's already gotten some good presents from some friends and he'll get enough from the family party this weekend.

I speak fluent baby.

He finally fell back asleep around 3:00, but by then I was so awake from listening to his babble and having him slobber on my face that I couldn't go back to sleep. So, here I am drinking some orange juice and reflecting on how a little ball of fat and bones can so easily take over my bed and my life.

One year old.

Tomorrow.

Amazing.

I will never be the same as I was on November 30, 2006. On December 1, "all was changed, changed utterly. A terrible beauty was born."

Terrible in the sense that my heart will never, ever be inside my body again. I have become so completely vulnerable. I now fear what is worse than death; a living death without my son.

I don't need to explain the beauty of it. I mean, look at him:

Anyway, I just got the low battery warning on the laptop, so that's it for now. Besides, I really don't know that I can say much more than what I've said.

Not Much Going On

So here's some recent pictures:

Some time ago I realized the truth in the fact that the only real problem I have in my life is me. Once I figured that out, honest to God, my stress disappeared.

Something to think about.

Poem of the Week: for Veteran's Day

In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row,
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved, and were loved, and now we lie
In Flanders fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.

John McCrae
Written in 1915

Show 'Em You're a Tiger

Poem of the Week

The poem of the week is coming a little late. Sorry. Just been crazy busy. I was feeling a bit romantic, so one would think I would turn to the Romantic Poets of the 18 and 19th centuries. No. Unfortunately, "Romantic" in that sense has a very different meaning. A hint for any guys out there: if you want a poem to woo a lady, you need to look for the Cavalier poets of the 17th century. That's where you'll find the good stuff.

IX: Song: To Celia

by Ben Johnson

Drink to me only with thine eyes,

And I will pledge with mine;

Or leave a kiss but in the cup,

And I'll not look for wine.

The thirst that from the soul doth rise

Doth ask a drink divine;

But might I of Jove's nectar sup,

I would not change for thine.

I sent thee late a rosy wreath,

Not so much honoring thee

As giving it a hope that there

It could not withered be.

But thou thereon didst only breathe

And sentst it back to me;

Since when it grows, and smells, I swear,

Not of itself, but thee.

I need to come up with stuff like this, because I say really stupid things once in a while. A while back, an e-Harmony commercial came on television. I told Lesley we should send our profiles in to see if it would match us up. She asked about what if it wouldn't. I responded, "Well, we haven't been married so long to get that strong of an attachment." WRONG!!!!!

It's times like these when knowing about the Cavalier poets of the 17th century comes in handy.

Poem of the Week

Ode on Solitude
Alexander Pope

Happy the man whose wish and care
A few paternal acres bound,
Content to breathe his native air,
In his own ground.

Whose herds with milk, whose fields with bread,
Whose flocks supply him with attire,
Whose trees in summer yield him shade,
In winter fire.

Blest! who can unconcernedly find
Hours, days, and years slide soft away,
In health of body, peace of mind,
Quiet by day,

Sound sleep by night; study and ease
Together mixed; sweet recreation
And innocence, which most does please,
With meditation.

Thus let me live, unseen, unknown;
Thus unlamented let me die;
Steal from the world, and not a stone
Tell where I lie.

Pictures

I know the reason most people check out the blog is to find out how we're doing and to see pictures of the cutest baby ever. Sorry about the recent rants. I just had some stuff I had to get off my chest.

Anyway, here's some pictures. I'm trying to give a perspective of how much Jacob has grown. The pictures above are Jacob with daddy when he was 1 month old (top) and 6 months old (bottom). It's really hard to remember how small he was when we brought him home. The pictures give a perspective, but to think about holding that little guy in my hands is really difficult.

Below are three pictures. The first one is from when Jacob was 2 months old. To get a perspective on his size, we took his picture next to a piece of looseleaf paper. The next two pictures are of him when he was 2 months old (think looseleaf paper) and his 10 month picture next to the same door.

Yep, he's standing on his own now. All he needs is a hand to hold and he's pulling himself up to look around. He can step his way down the edge of the couch now, too, so we figure walking isn't too far away.

It's just hard to believe that the little bundle of fat and bones we brought home from the hospital that didn't weigh 5 pounds is getting ready to start walking. Amazing really. And fun. I love being a daddy. And being a mother has made Lesley even more beautiful than she was before, which was hard to top. Lesley is the love of my life. Jacob is the fun of my life.

Poem of the Week: Sonnet 116

Let me not to the marriage of true minds
Admit impediments. Love is not love
Which alters when it alteration finds,
Or bends with the remover to remove:
O no! it is an ever-fixed mark
That looks on tempests and is never shaken;
It is the star to every wandering bark,
Whose worth's unknown, although his height be taken.
Love's not Time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks
Within his bending sickle's compass come:
Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks,
But bears it out even to the edge of doom.
If this be error and upon me proved,
I never writ, nor no man ever loved.

William Shakespeare

Gossip City, The Capitol of Missouri

There's a game I think people should play at parties. It's one that's used a lot in youth groups to teach an important lesson.

You pick three members of your group and send them away. The remaining members make up a story. It could be a story about anything. It doesn't matter. Be imaginitive.

You bring those sent away back one at a time. The first one to come back hears the story from one of the members of the group who made it up. This person who is hearing the story then has to relate the story from memory to the second one to return to the group. The second hearer becomes the next story-teller to the third one sent away, who then has to repeat the story to the original group.

Normally, by the time the story gets back to the original group, it's unrecognizable. It's become so twisted and so many details forgotten, and other "details" filled in, that it's a completely different tale.

This game usually takes about 15 to 20 minutes to play. If this can happen in the space of 20 minutes, with the story only being related to 3 different people, it's no wonder that I've heard rumors about Lesley and I getting married that are completely wrong after they've been through the rumor mill of Jefferson City throughout the last week.

I had dinner with a friend the other night, who informed me that the rumors are that Lesley and I got married in Columbia by Rev. John Prenger and that our reception was at the Capital Plaza Hotel.

The only thing about this that's true is that Lesley and I did get married in Columbia last weekend. Not that it's anybody's business.

I also heard a rumor several weeks ago that I was working at KMart in Jefferson City and am completely miserable. Nothing about that is true. For the record, I'm actually happier now than I can ever remember being in my entire life. And, nothing against KMart, but I don't work there.

Frankly, it surprises and saddens me.

It surprises me because people know the lesson of the story exercise I described above. And yet, no matter how many times the gossip mill of Jefferson City proves to be wrong, people still believe what they hear.

Which leads me to why it saddens me: the reason people still believe what they hear is because they want to believe it. People want "to know." I don't know why. Perhaps people want "to know" because they sincerely care about Lesley and Jacob and me. Or perhaps, for some, people want "to know" for less generous motives. Or perhaps people want "to know" simply because they get some sense of importance out of being able to pass on information that someone else might not know. Whether that information is true or not is completely irrelevant.

In the end, I've decided that it's just not worth me spending a lot of time on. Admittedly, I've spent more time than I should have being angry about all the rumors that have followed me for more than a year now. I guess people are always just going to talk. I hope, though, that people will realize that they shouldn't believe everything they hear. As a matter of fact, people should believe nothing of what they hear, and only half of what they see.

St. Francis de Sales once took a woman who had confessed the sin of gossip up a mountain. Once they were at the top, he opened a feather pillow and allowed the wind to scatter the feathers from the pillow all across the countryside. He then instructed the woman to collect all the feathers. When she responded that she couldn't possibly re-gather all the feathers, he told her that neither could she possibly restore the damage that she had done by her gossiping.

10 Things You Should Never Say to a Woman

I've learned so much from Lesley since we started sharing our lives together.

For example, I've definitely learned that there are certain things I should never say again.


For any budding romantics, please take this advice:


10) "You're not fat, you're pregnant." You see, while this seems like you're trying to affirm her, all it really does is cause some really awkward questions about how you've noticed her figure change.


9) "What difference does it make? Do you like the jeans?" She asked the ever fatal question, "Do these make my butt look big?" This was my response...once.

8) Any reference whatsoever to a woman passing gas. For the record, Lesley never passes gas.

7) "Well, you're the one growing thorns on your legs." Lesley wanted to cuddle right up until I said this.

6) I've learned that after you make a stupid comment like the one in number 7, you should never, ever, ever back it up with something like, "Oh, I see you've pulled the weeds," after she's shaved.

5)I've learned, in no uncertain terms, that men do not have the responsibility of making suggestions about breast feeding.

4) It's not that I shouldn't say anything about decorating any room in the house, but that the only thing I need to say is, "Yes, dear." Any more than that is received with one of those gracious smiles and nods of the head.

3) "But I like that shirt. I've had it for like 18 years." It's not that this is necessarily wrong to say, just useless.

2) "Will you marry me?" while she's coming out of the bathroom. Trust me, just don't.

And the number one thing you should never, ever say to a woman (especially your wife)...

1) "No." Need I explain?

Poem of the Week: Magic

To go along with my blog below, I've decided to go with this poem, again by Shel Silverstein, again from the book Where the Sidewalk Ends.

Sandra's seen a leprechaun,

Eddie touched a troll,

Laurie danced with witches once,

Charlie found some goblin's gold.

Donald heard a mermaid sing,

Suzie spied an elf,

But all the magic I have known,

I've had to make myself.

My Magic Wand

I found a magic wand the other day. No kidding!

Anyway, this wand, with a wave, turns anything into exactly what I want it to be. Seriously!

The computer at work was running really slow the other day. A wave of the wand and, zap! it was running even more slow.

Now, I initially thought that I wanted the computer to run more quickly, but it didn't. So I thought to myself, "Well, if I waved my wand, and the computer started running more slowly, that must mean I wanted the computer to go more slowly." So I had to ask myself, "Why would I want the computer to run more slowly?"

"It must be," I said to myself, "because I want to go down the hall and visit with Brince (one of our office support staff)." So I went down the hall and had a great talk with Brince about a movie I had just seen on racism in my class at Lincoln. Brince had some great insight into the subject and we had one of the best discussions I've ever had on the subject of racism.

Another example, I waved my magic wand at the ATM machine at my bank in order to fill my bank account with millions of dollars. When I looked at my receipt checking on my balance, there was not millions of dollars in my account. So, again, I said to myself, "I waved my wand to make my bank account have exactly the amount of money that I want in there. Why would I want to have only this amount?"

"Maybe," I answered myself, "I want to have this amount in order to practice self-discipline through budgeting, a skill that can then be utilized in other places in my life." So while I didn't get millions of dollars in my account, I did get exactly what I wanted on a deeper level.

So you see, the way the wand works is: If I wave it in order to change something, and the thing doesn't change, then I must want whatever it is to be exactly the way it is. So then I have to deepen my understanding of myself about why whatever it is I want to change is actually exactly the way it's supposed to be, the best of all possibilities. And that makes me happy with things just the way they are.

I like my magic wand. There are times in my life I've gotten what I asked for, but not what I really wanted. With my magic wand, I will always get exactly what I want, even if it's not what I ask for.

So what it comes down to is faith in the magic that even though things on the surface might not be the way I would like them to be, they are the way they should be for me at this time in my life. Then, after faith, it takes understanding why these things really are the way they should be, and I learn to be happy with them for what they are.

I'm going to wave my wand now so that everyone can have a magic wand just like mine; so that everyone can make things exactly the way they want them to be, even if things are not the way they would ask them to be.

New Feature: Poem of the Week: Hug O' War

I will not play at tug o' war.

I'd rather play at hug o' war,

where everone hugs

instead of tugs,

Where everyone giggles

and rolls on the rug,

Where everyone kisses,

And everyone grins,

And everyone cuddles,

and everyone wins.

By: Shel Silverstein

From: Where the Sidewalk Ends

Sometimes I Wonder

There are a few things that have me flabbergasted.

Some of them seem to stand out.

I had to go to the DMV in Columbia this week. I went on Tuesday, stopping by during a break at work. 50 people standing in line; 1 person working behind the counter. I waited 45 minutes until I had to go back to work. Admittedly, it was lunch time. So I thought I would go back during a break in the middle of the afternoon thinking that the line would have thinned because of people like me getting back to work.

Nope.

Two and a half hours later, there were 60 people in line; 1 person working at the counter.

I decided to skip out of work 10 minutes early so I could get there right before they closed. Nothing doing. They closed 5 minutes early.

So I went back the next morning, deciding to call in late for work so that I could get everything done. The doors opened with about 10 people waiting outside. 4 people working behind the counter.

Where were all these DMV empoyees Tuesday?

And how do people in Columbia get anything done? No offense my Columbia readers, but I mean, geeze. Seriously, how do you people get anything done?

I told my tale of woe to a coworker who lives in Columbia. This person said to me, "Oh yeah, whenever I need to do anything with the DMV, I take the day off work."

Wow.

That's all I can say about that.

To be honest, Jefferson City's ain't all that much better.

So, one of the things that most amazes me is the DMV.

Anyway, I had to go to the DMV because I bought a motorcycle.

I'm a little bit twisted. I'll admit it.

I do things to Jacob just to see how he reacts.

For example, there is a little, yellow, rubber ducky that he loves to play with and chew on in the bathtub. I'll take it away from him and set it across the little child's tub he sits in just to see what he does. He gets so mad and starts splashing water everywhere.

The even more twisted part is, I think it's funny.

Jacob is starting to focus on things, not only visually, but mentally as well. For example, the other day he was wanting to chew on the cable from the controller to the Playstation. Lesley and I spent about five minutes trying to distract him from it. We presented him other toys, carried him across the room, and tried to hold him and cuddle him to get him to leave the cable alone.

He wanted that cable, by golly, and he was gonna get it. No matter what we did, he fought it. He would take the toy and toss it aside. We would carry him across the room; he would crawl right back. We tried to cuddle him in a different room; he would twist and squirm until we let him down. And then he started to crawl back to the living room! He wanted that cable!

That's a very good sign of development. It's called "permanence of memory." It means that he's beginning to create mental images of what he wants instead of just wanting whatever happens to be in front of him.

Anyway, there isn't much activity on the homefront. We just keep plugging away at life.

Healthy Baby

Jacob had a regular doctor's visit this week. He's a healthy little guy. The doctor's words were something to the order of: "I'm really impressed with how well he's doing."

The low-down is basically this: Jacob is 8 months old. He was 7 weeks early. His adjusted age is only 6 1/2 months old then. The doctor said that he is doing things that 9 month olds usually do.

Can you tell I'm a proud daddy?

He is amazing. A long time ago, Lesley and I were visiting some friends. The mom in the family told us, "You know, you hear people talk about having a kid as 'miraculous', 'life changing', 'fulfilling', 'amazing'. The fact is having a kid is fun." She was dead on.

Oh, and by the way, the doctor said one more ear infection and he's getting tubes. Doc asked which color would we like. He was serious.

I've Been Thinking...

Lesley and I were talking the other day about God's omniscience and human free will. You know, the kind of thing most people talk about on the way to the grocery store.


Anyway, we were discussing how human free will works with God being omniscient, and it occurred to me that God is like a GPS tracker.


When we were on vacation in San Diego, we rented a car and got a GPS computer to show us around San Diego. The GPS guided us through San Diego. "In 1 mile, turn right," it would say. Or, "In .2 miles, stay left." Or, "In 1 mile, turn right and arrive at destination." (This last part was usually pronounced in a very smug voice, as if this little box were very proud of itself fro having guided us correctly.)

Every once in a while, because of traffic or maybe because there was something up ahead that looked interesting, we weren't able or chose not to follow the directions of the GPS. Then the machine would flash, "Revising Route." It would then change the directions it would give us in order to guide us back to where we were supposed to be.


That's a lot like how God's omniscience and human free will work. God knows the way we are supposed to go, and is constantly giving us directions because he sees the whole path we are supposed to take. We, however, are driving the vehicle, and so we have control over whether we follow God's directions. If we can't, or more often, choose not to follow God's lead, he revises our route, and faithfully begins to give us new directions to get us back on track.


God is faithful, and will always be there to guide us, even when we take turns, or refuse to turn, when he tells us to do something else.


GPS: God's Positioning System.


Anyway, here's pictures of the baby:

Sick Again

Little guy is sick again. He's been running a fever and screaming at night. It's not very fun. But he's still really cute.

See:

It's Official

Jacob is crawling. Not just the scooching, lunging, rolling that he's been doing. He got up on all fours and moved his little arms and legs.

Watching him develop is the most amazing thing.

Being a parent is just fun.

Everything Is Good

As Shannon pointed out in the comments, everything is good in our world. Life is pretty routine these days.

There is a great line in the Simpson's episode "A Milhouse Divided". This is the episode in which Milhouse's parents get a divorce. Homer is talking to Milhouse's dad, who is warning Homer not to take his marriage to Marge for granted. Homer responds completely confident in his relationship with Marge, "Marge and I have one thing that can never be broken: a strong marriage built on a solid foundation of routine."

That's pretty much our life right now. We're going to work, coming home, spending our evenings together, visiting friends occasionally, and pretty much following the routine.We're trying hard to keep Jacob on a schedule, but when we think we've got it down (he's going to bed at 8:30 pretty regularly), he goes and decides to stay up and play until 11:00. He's kind of funny that way. We keep working with him, to regularize his schedule. It's actually kind of fun.

Speaking of The Simpson's, I loved the movie. Oh man, I laughed for an hour and a half.

Anyway, that's it from Jamie, Lesley and Jacob-land.

I put a disclaimer about placing comments on the blog over in the side bar. If you want to leave a comment, make sure you see that first.

The Best Vacation Ever

We went on vacation to beautiful San Diego, CA. It was great. We spent a couple of days with Lesley's cousin Matt who is just an all-around great guy.

Then we went to the San Diego Zoo and got to see pandas, lions, bears, lots of birds, camels, pigs (The female pigs were much more exciting than the male pigs. I mean, the male pigs were just a bunch of real boars!) and Lesley's favorites, the giraffe.

The next day, we went to Sea World San Diego, which was really cool. Daddy fed some dolphins and mommy actually got to pet one, too. That was really cool. We saw baluga whales, polar bears, penguins, sharks, and got splashed by Shamu.

We left Matt's place, and went to Coronado Island, where we spent the rest of our vacation. We stayed at the lavish Hotel Del Coronado, which is amazing. It overlooks the Pacific Ocean, and Jacob even got to sit in the ocean for a little bit.

It was a great time. I don't know what else to say. It was just a great time.

Still Sick

We've been giving Jacob his antiobotics for a week now, and he just didn't seem to be getting any better.

Lesley took him back to the doctor today, who said that now he has an ear infection. We had been giving him a pretty low dose of amoxycillin. We've also noticed that he's had some diarrhea and a rash. We kind of expected the diarrhea. Antibiotics can do that. But the rash makes us think that he's probably allergic to the amoxycillin. He would get that from daddy.

I'm allergic to penicillin, and the differing variations thereof. We're going to let the doc know about the rash to see what he thinks.

Anyway, the doc gave him a prescription for azithromycin, "Super-Antibiotic." Hopefully, this will take care of him. The poor little guy is so miserable right now. You can see it in his eyes.

Mommy, Daddy doesn't feel very good.

Big man is sick.

We're trying to teach Jacob the importance of sharing. You can never start that kind of thing too young.

In an effort to show us just how much he's learned, he's decided to give daddy his cold and sinus infection. So now we're both sick, and Lesley is taking good care of us. Poor girl.

Probably had something to do with him sucking on his hands and then sticking his hands into daddy's mouth. Just a theory.

Anyway, our house is now like the Simpon's episode, where the whole town of Springfield orders these juicers from Japan, and the "Osaka Flu" gets sent over. Everyone gets sick except Marge, who gets put in jail because while stressed out, she accidently shoplifts a bottle of bourbon for Grandpa Simpson. Lesley hasn't been caught stealing though, at least not yet.

Anyway, Jacob and I are doing a lot of father and son types of activites, now, like sneezing out thick green mucus, snorting as we try to breathe, and taking our daily antibiotics. It's a real family affair.

Daddy, I don't feel very good.

Little man is sick.

He started day care Friday, June 1. By Tuesday, he was up in the middle of the night screaming his little head off. Lesley took him to the doctor, and it turns that he had gotten a cold that turned into a sinus infection.

He's all boogers, snot, and this goopy green stuff coming out of the corner of his eyes now.

We can see an improvement in him. He's sleeping through the night again now, at least as much as ever did. He'll fall asleep about 8:30, 9:00. Then wake up between 4:30 and 5:00 in the morning. We usually feed him, and he falls back to sleep while we are getting ready for the day.

Everybody keeps saying, "Well, this is good. He's gotta build his immune system."

They weren't the ones up with him while he was screaming for two hours in the middle of the night because his throat was sore. It's not that I don't want him not to build up his immune system. I do want him to do that. But isn't there like a vitamin C supplement we could give him?

Anyway, he's still really cute. Even when he's got snot running out of both nostrils into his mouth.

Everything I need to know in life...

I learned from my 6 month old.

Jacob is six months old today, and to celebrate, I've been thinking about some of the things he has taught me so far in his short, but wisdom-filled life.

1. People want to do things for me when I smile. When I scream, people might move faster, but they don't necessarily move more willingly.

2. All I really need to be happy is some clean britches and a full belly.

3. I can communicate more love with a smile than with a million words.

4. Mommies are, generally speaking, more interesting than daddies.

5. There's nothing like a good burp to make a person feel better.

6. Farts can be cute.

7. Just because I can roll over, doesn't necessarily mean I should.

8. Mommies often walk a tightrope between giving attention to baby and giving attention to daddy.

9. It is possible to produce over 10 gallons of drool in a 24 hour period.

10. There really are only three things that I should ever get upset about: A) When I'm hungry; B) When I'm tired; C) When I should change my pants as quickly as possible.

11. There's no more comfortable place than in the arms of someone who loves you more than life.

12. Adults are often too rational to understand really what is going on.

13. Swinging is fun.

14. I don't have to worry about anything because I know that no matter how tired their arms may get, I will have someone to hold me up.

15. Taking a nap whenever and wherever I feel like is not such a bad idea.

16. The most pressing question I have whenever I experience something new is, "Will it fit in my mouth?"

17. Everything is fascinating.

Jacob's head is growing faster than the rest of him, proportionally speaking. "Nothing to worry about," the doctor says. I never thought it would be something to worry about. To me, it's just a sign that he's got a really big brain, and based on the life lessons he's taught me so far, there can be no denying it. Jacob is one smart cookie.

Pictures of My Musical Muse

Singing a New Song

Having a baby has brought some new talents in me that I didn't know I had. For example, when the little guy is grumpy, I find myself making up songs. Some are songs that are completely original, like "I've Got the Baby Bath Blues":

Well, my name is Jacob.
And I've got the blues.
I said my name is Jacob.
And I've got the blues.
Cuz I hate being naked.
It's the baby bath blues.

Well, now mommy,
She treats me right.
And my daddy,
always by my side.
But when it's bathtime,
Two worlds collide.

I start to screamin'
Pitch quite a fit.
I start to squirmin'
to get out of it.
I hate that bath.
I hate it bad.
Please let me go,
Won't ya, mom and dad.

My name is Jacob.
I've got the blues.
I said my name is Jacob.
I've got the blues.
I hate bein' naked.
Right down to my shoes.
My name is Jacob
And I've got the baby bath blues.

Oh yeah.

Then there are songs I make up the tune of other songs. This one can be sung to the melody of the Folsom Prison Blues by Johnny Cash.

Well, I have a poop a comin'.
It's comin' round the bend.
And I've been a pushin'
out my rear end.
But it just ain't a happenin'.
No, I just can't poop.
I know when it gets here
it's gonna be like soup.

Well, I am just a baby,
my momma tells me, "Son,
I get so worried when
Your poop won't come."
I really am a tryin'.
Trust me mom and dad.
I really am a pushin'.
I want to poop so bad.

Oh man there it comes,
No, I won't stop now.
Boy I filled that diaper, and
I need a new one now.
Change my dirty diaper.
Make me fresh and clean.
You said you wanted poop.
Aren't you proud of me?

These songs probably aren't grammy material, but they sure get him to stop crying. Jacob loves music. Whenever he starts hollering, we start singing and he gets quiet and listens so intently that you think he would sing along.

I wonder if that's going to be a sign of something later.

Anyway, that's all the news. There will be pictures coming soon. I promise.

Time, Time, Time

See what's become of me?

You know. You go to work.

You come home.

You go to school.

You stop by the store.

You change a diaper.

You eat a Reese's Peanut Cup.

You do some homework.

You hold your baby.

You take out the trash.

You find a dime on the ground.

You drink a cup of tea.

You stop by McDonald's.

You gas up your car and wash the windshield while you're there.

You wait in line.

Everywhere.

Your lips get chapped because of the cold.

You sleep.

You get some laundry done.

And scrub your tub.

And get old.

And the tic, tic, toc of the clock doesn't slow or speed up.

Relentless, the unstoppable object.

And it's been two weeks since you've blogged,

or checked your email,

or phoned the people who are closest to you.

The Game is Afoot!

It's become a game really. Like playing chess with a master champion.

You see, it began with a simple scream. We would change his diaper. End of game. We win.

But then he adapted.

Scream. Go to change his diaper. Get peed on. One for him.

We adapted. We started waiting a minute while he finished his business.

He's really smart though.

Scream. Wait a little. Diaper's wet, good. Change him. Then he would poop while his diaper was off. One for him.

We changed our tactics. We would wait for the familiar sounds that let us know there was more in the diaper than the liquid gold. We were winning again.

He truly is really smart though.

He screams. We wait for the sounds that tell us his own special little gift for us has arrived. We go to change him, but he holds on to just enough to make a mess while the diaper was off again.

How do I know he's doing this on purpose as a little game? That he's really that smart?

Because he never does this at Grandma's house.

Don't let the pretty face fool you. There's a mastermind lurking underneath that innocent exterior.

Nothing New, But Good News

I've had a few people lately comment on how there hasn't been any blogging for a bit. That's true. I've been pretty busy with stuff at work. And this is just a catch-up to what's been going on in our lives.

I'm gearing up for my next semester at school. Forging ahead with the academic work I need to complete so that I can eventually be a licensed counselor. Work is going on as usual. I love working with the kids. Teenagers are just cool.

Lesley is dreading her return to work next week. Other than that, she just continues to amaze me with what a good mommy she is.

Jacob is, well, awake more now. We're trying to get his night and day rhythms worked out, but it might be a while yet. As of today, he's still "negative one week old." That's the way we were told to think about him developmentally. He smiles a lot though, probably just as much as he screams. He's a little chatter box, too. Of course, most of his chatter is just grunts and grimaces.

We're doing fine. Everyone is still healthy, which is a real blessing considering how much cold and flu has gone through our families over the holidays.

And that's all the news. When I can, I'll put up some more pictures and maybe some top ten's and maybe even a few pick-up lines.